


deep in the dark, I am not alone

by ThunderstormsandMemories



Series: 15 days of fatt 2020 [6]
Category: Friends at the Table (Podcast)
Genre: 15 Days of FatT, 15 Days of FatT 2020, Established Relationship, Huddling For Warmth, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-03-26
Updated: 2020-03-26
Packaged: 2021-02-28 22:14:09
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,095
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23334439
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ThunderstormsandMemories/pseuds/ThunderstormsandMemories
Summary: Ephrim and Throndir steal time together during the long dark winter
Relationships: Ephrim/Throndir (Friends at the Table)
Series: 15 days of fatt 2020 [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1667332
Comments: 1
Kudos: 16





	deep in the dark, I am not alone

**Author's Note:**

> partially written for 15 days of fatt 2019 (prompt: shelter) and then finished and posted for 15 days of fatt 2020 (prompt: home)

A few years ago, the snow wouldn’t have been a problem for Ephrim. A few years ago, when summoning flames was as effortless as a quick movement of his hand, he could have melted a path clear when the snow grew too deep for him to walk comfortably, and he could have kept himself warm the whole time he was outside, instead of having to fumble with a tinderbox once he got inside, damp and shivering and numb. And now he didn’t have his familiar bright flames, only the awful power of the Heat and the Dark, and one hand that was gloved and clumsy and another that was always stiff and shaking with cold.

He tried and failed, once more, to get a fire started, cursing under his breath—his visible breath, that he could see, because of how cold it was, because he couldn’t start the fucking fire—about his useless hands and his cold wet socks and how hungry he was, but he couldn’t eat, not while there wasn’t enough to go around. And he was looking forward to another sleepless night, curled up under a blanket that wasn’t thick enough to keep out the chill that had settled into his bones, kept awake by his empty stomach and waking in the morning barely rested and sore from shivering.

“Hey, let me get that,” said Throndir, placing his hand over Ephrim’s, and Ephrim leaned back against him briefly, closed his eyes and breathed in, drawing comfort from Throndir’s warm solid presence, his familiar touch. Throndir got the fire lit, and stood there a moment longer, letting Ephrim lean against him for support. “You doing okay?”

“Yeah, I’m doing great,” Ephrim said. “I mean, can’t complain, you know how it is.”

“I do know,” said Throndir, “and that’s why I’m asking.” Ephrim shrugged, staring into the fire, now crackling cheerfully in the hearth, caught in his avoidance. “Here, first take off your coat. It’s soaked through, you’ll never get warm like that.” So Ephrim let Throndir peel him out of his cold damp outer layers and wrap him in a blanket. They sat together in silence a moment on the carpet in front of the fireplace, Ephrim’s head resting on Throndir’s shoulder, Throndir’s arm around him, their fingers laced together, until Ephrim’s teeth stopped chattering. It might take a while for feeling to return to his toes, but he began to relax a little, to feel almost comfortable.

“Thanks,” he said, voice muffled and face still pressed against Throndir’s neck.

“Anytime,” Throndir said. “And I literally mean that. I know we can’t really take breaks, not when we have to help keep everyone alive, but you have to let someone else take care of you sometimes otherwise you’ll burn out.”

Ephrim shifted around so he could stare at Throndir, because he wasn’t sure how else to respond to such a bad pun. “Did you do that on purpose?”

“Not originally,” Throndir said sheepishly, “but then I realized and said it anyway.”

Ephrim couldn’t stop himself from smiling, fond and open, and he leaned closer to Throndir, who turned so that he could kiss Ephrim gently on the forehead, and Ephrim smiled even wider.

“There,” Throndir said, satisfied, the same look he got after a successful day of hunting or any other job well done. “It’s been too long since I’ve seen you smile like that.”

“Really,” Ephrim said, smirking, a mischievous drawl creeping into his voice, “well, I know what you can do to make me smile more often.”

They were silent for a moment, except for the crackle of the fire, and the rustle of their clothing and hands on skin, lips on lips, and then Throndir pulled away long enough to say, “I’m glad you’re here with me.”

“Me too,” Ephrim said. “There’s no one else I’d rather build a new home in the middle of the apocalypse with.”

“Me either,” said Throndir. “You know, I really think this is going to work out. We can do this.” And here, safe in Throndir’s arms, Ephrim really did believe that.

“I couldn’t do it without you,” Ephrim said. He linked his fingers with Throndir’s, raised their joined hands to his lips to brush a kiss across Throndir’s knuckles, maintaining eye contact with Throndir, who shivered but didn’t look away. And then Ephrim startled as a particularly violent gust of wind rattled at the windows, interrupting whatever Throndir was going to say, and they both laughed. “Just the wind.”

“Just the wind,” Throndir echoed, putting his arm around Ephrim. “We’re safe in here.”

“For now,” Ephrim said. “And for now that’s enough.”

It wouldn’t always be. Soon there would be new concerns, and old concerns put off for too long, another trip out into the cold, dark forest in desperate search of food and supplies that wouldn’t be abundant until spring, if spring ever came, another building to repair and hope that the roof held this time. But there would also be other moments like this, moments of quiet and warmth, wrapped in Throndir’s arms. There would be Red Jack’s booming laughter as he poured them all another drink, watching Benjamin and the oni kids throw snowballs at each other, Rosana and Sunder bickering fondly about theology, Kodiak laying his massive head in everyone’s lap in turn to beg for people food that he definitely wasn’t supposed to be eating but Throndir would slip him table scraps anyway, and Ephrim would pretend to disapprove but really he spoiled Kodiak as much as anyone.

Tomorrow Ephrim would wake up and force himself to walk out into the cold, wrapped in a cloak that had seen better days and been mended one too many times, to make sure no disaster had struck overnight, and then he would visit Rosana and Benjamin, let them feed him soup until he was warm enough to venture outside again, the coziness of their little home a reminder of what he was working so hard to preserve. It was worth it, probably, all the long cold days and dark hungry nights, if he could build a place where people could not just survive but live happily. Though in his bleakest moments, when hoping for more seemed impossible, he would have settled for survival, his world shrinking to a never-ending list of tasks and only the fear of how much worse failure could be carrying him forward. But for now the only task that he needed to focus on was holding Throndir until they forgot about the cold wind raging outside.

**Author's Note:**

> title from shelter by like torches
> 
> stay tuned for another longer post-canon ephrondir fic that I'll hopefully post soonish (it was supposed to be for the day 4 prompt consequences but uh. it got kinda out of control)


End file.
